Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Adjustments

I have no idea where to start as I haven't blogged in a long time!!! I was thinking last night about wanting to start back with blogging and here I am :). I honestly don't have any hobbies and don't have a whole lot of free time to just sit down and do something for myself. I don't have time to scrapbook, do crafts, go shopping or anything fun like that so blogging will be my thing as I do have time at work to blogg so I hope this works out. I love to read other peoples bloggs and I hope you enjoy reading mine. This is a way for me just to let my feelings go and express what I am feeling at this very moment and this probably will be really long. I have no idea how often I'll blogg. I guess just whenever I want to and have something to say. :) We'll see how this goes. :)

Life is in the fast lane at the Schelle household and have had to adjust big time to a new little boy in our household. It's been a good adjustment and wouldn't change it. I honestly didn't realize how much more work it would be even though going from one to two was so much harder than going from two to three...I had a tougher time adjusting to having caleb than I am with Levi. It's funny how different life is with each child. I didn't have depression with Isaac or Caleb but I did have a little with Levi. The first two weeks home with Levi I went on as a normal person and went through the day, but in the back of my head I was down thinking that it was over. The excitement of labor, the hospital stay, people coming over to visit to see him, the meals brought to us, and the newness of him. It was hard. This could possibly be our last baby and that thought just makes me sad as well. He's only a newborn once and this little for so long, I just want to soak it up and keep it like this just a little bit longer. Today I was dressing Levi and was putting him in a romper and thought, "this outfit won't last long" and was looking through his drawers at the summer outfits he won't even get to wear that are absolutely adorable b/c of the weather and or b/c he's growing so much and it made me frown a little bit. I can say though, I am really enjoying him. He's such a good baby and even though I don't get to hold him much and don't get to interact w/ him as much as I would like, I sure am treasuring the moments of him and am so thankful God gave me him!!! I am proud to be his mom!!

Ashley and I are in the fast lane of life as I mentioned before. We honestly don't get a break. Our days are FULL and we are tired!!! I am so thankful he's on my team and that we are doing this together...Yes, we get aggrivated at times and times are tough but life isn't easy and it never will be. We work long days just to keep the household going and at the end of the day when I can sit down (at 11:30pm) and think about the day and our kids, I thank God for a good day or will thank him that we're done for that day if it's been a bad day. :)

This week has been a whole lot better than last week. Last week was my first week back at work and to tell you, it was hard and I say hard for two different reasons, hard to leave my family and hard on my body and to adjust to a new schedule!!! I am tired. Being home for 4 wks was nice and I didn't have a schedule I really enjoyed that. I had all day to get stuff done and to eat dinner w/ my family but reality snuck back in and I had to go back to work and it was hard to adjust. My time is limited now and I only have so much I can sqeeze in. I am very picky about the way my house looks and it has to be clean and picked up before i'm satisfied even though if you've been to my house sometimes it's not and it drives me nuts and I am embarrassed as I didn't get to this or that, but I have told myself these past few wks to let it go.. I can't get everything done in a 5 hr period before having to go to work...It will be there tomorrow and i may just have to have the weekend to play catch up even though I stress big time on how my house looks..It's very hard for me to let it go.. I cleaned up the kitchen last night before bed b/c i couldn't stand going to bed w/out it being done even though I know it won't go anywhere...My days are full and I know I can't do it all so if I have dinner made, the boys fed, clothed and down for naps and have clean clothes in the basket and the dishes cleaned and the kitchen cleaned up w/ the dishwasher unloaded for ashley, and my bed made, I am trying to be content w/ that..It's just really hard for me to adjust right now to the new life style...Plus, I'm trying to get my workouts in as well which I am making that a priority as my body needs some adjustments as well..hahaha...I am not content with it and it needs to change, so I'm working hard to get back to where I was before pregnancy and it's not easy.. Adjusting is hard but we're doing it..

I remind myself a lot of Phillipians 4:13. "I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength" Simple verse but he's giving me strength for my busy and full weeks and I give him all the glory. :)

Thank you for reading..God Bless you!!

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